Whelp, I feel like I need to start this post with a re-boot. When I first wrote “Dear Lori” in September 2020, the idea was to make it a semi-regular feature where I answered some of the myriad questions I’ve received over the years about race and systemic racism. (If inclined, you can read details of this column’s genesis here.)
But two “Dear Lori”s in I paused… then stopped. One reason was lack of time: I returned full-time to my TV writing gig while also dealing with my two school-aged children who were adjusting to distance learning, in addition to some other challenging personal matters.
The other reason was the nasty political landscape. The level of divisiveness, purposeful misinformation, vitriol and literal insurrection on January 6, 2021 made me feel like this column was pointless.
And now it’s February 2022. As voting rights continue to be under attack and fears and misinformation around Critical Race Theory have emboldened several states to legalize suppression of education about America’s history of racism, I once more feel like I need to do something, anything that might help. Especially as I witness even more organized attempts to undermine understanding, change, democracy and equity.
So… I’m back. And I’m committing to the mental and emotional labor that answering some of these questions takes.
That all said now, I’m ready to address a question asked of me a few days ago on Facebook (excuse me, Meta). Which I find ironic and fitting, because that’s the very platform where this whole me answering people’s questions about race thing began in the first place…
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[All letters/queries are published verbatim and without corrections. Only the names have been changed.]
On February 5th, I published a GBN post on how Dr. Jessica Watkins will become the first Black woman astronaut to spend months in space when she heads to the International Space Station in April. Below is one of the comments/questions the post received.
Dear Lori:
Who cares??? Why does it always have to be first black this and first black that??? –Robert
Dear Robert:
Thank you for your question. Although its intent feels snarky and dismissive instead of genuinely curious, I’m answering. Because, intentions aside, I don’t think you are alone in this query.
In fact I know you’re not, because as Editor-in-Chief of Good Black News and when authoring the “A Year of Good Black News” Page-A-Day® Calendar for 2022, I actually have asked it of myself (albeit in a much kinder, pensive tone) — why are Black firsts still a thing? And should I keep shining a light on them?
The answers I came up with for why there’s a need for “first Black this and first Black that,” are pretty simple:
1) “Firsts” inspire. Those who think something might be impossible for them based on race, gender, disability or economic status — whatever factor – seeing someone who looks like them or with a similar background doing that very thing helps dissolve both real and perceived barriers to that achievement.
People derive hope from hearing about “firsts.” So I share them whenever I can, because perhaps some young Black girl who has fantasized about traveling into and spending time in space now sees a path to make that dream a reality because she saw Dr. Watkins’ story.
2) “Firsts” highlight inequities. If someone sees a “first” and reacts by saying “What took so damn long? It’s 2022!” — that’s a good reason to share it, too. Sharing “firsts” can provoke much-needed and deeper questionings into why it has taken so much time to make these strides and inroads. Like, what possible historic or systemic reasons could there be within organizations or institutions — educational, governmental — that it’s taken until this year for a Black woman to spend a few months on the International Space Station?
By the way, I’m not picking on NASA here — NASA has done active recruiting to diversify its astronaut training programs (cool documentary about that here) — I’m saying if you react to a “first” by wondering what’s taken so long, follow that wonder and most likely the answer you find will hip you to some inequities that are causing the dearth of Black people in certain positions or fields.
3) Celebrating “firsts” is human nature. No matter when or where firsts happen, human beings love to exalt firsts, as firsts at their essence signify when the impossible has become possible for us. It’s why we are all still taught Magellan was the first explorer to circumnavigate the globe, Neil Armstrong was the first human being to walk on the moon or Kamala Harris is the first Black East Indian Woman Vice President of the United States of America (she packed in A LOT of firsts there!). I mean, this right here is the whole ass reason the Guinness Book of World Records is still even a thing!
I hope my answer helps, Robert, I truly do. Now I have a question for you – have you ever bothered to ask why anybody cares about any of the “firsts” we all know about (eg. man on moon, female Supreme Court justice, airplane flight) or why you were taught them? What’s the intent behind that? Could maybe it be to give people a sense of their abilities, possibilities, worthiness? Maybe? And if so, why is it bothersome to you when Black people engage in this type of celebration?
If you choose to answer me, trust me, you will be the first.
Take care and all best,
Lori
Great post! And the reader didn’t question the millions of firsts that athletes do. Every day they make up a new “first” statistic. It’s far more important to me to hear of black firsts than to hear who has the most three-point shots on a February 4th while wearing a red jersey and yellow tennis shoes. Now, really!
“If you choose to answer me, trust me, you will be the first.”
Ha! Nice (but gentle) pushback. Great response to a common, insincere question that is really another way of saying “shut up.” I care and appreciate the “firsts” and Good Black News and the podcast (1-2 min!) is a great response to the thousands of podcasts that go way too long. Dear Lori, keep it up! And do share your latest TV gig when appropriate!
Ty Michael! The gig I’m referring to in my response was the last season of “The Bold Type.” My new gig is “The Best Man: The Final Chapters” for Peacock.
Oh Lori, can I just say big big kudos on the writing for “The Best Man: The Final Chapters” – it is so enjoyable!
So glad you like it!
This is beautiful – thank you for taking the time and energy to articulate your response! Loved every word.
Great reply! I’m saving it.
Lori, you always function with such grace. It’s astonishing (not that you have grace) but the ability to put into words such obvious, common sense in written form for folks who, who knows, may or may not *really engage with such truth. The examples above are stunning and I do hope “Robert” becomes one of those firsts, by civilly engaging. The work you do with GBN is also filled with such grace. Wishing you well and a ton of love as you add in the “Dear Lori” portion in the days/weeks/months ahead. The “Roberts”, and all of us, are better for it.
Thank you so much, Adrienne! Please share and spread the word!
[…] Link to Good Black News […]
Racist sentiment is often handed down generation to generation, regardless of color or creed. If it’s deliberate, it’s something I strongly feel amounts to a form of child abuse: to rear one’s impressionably very young children in an environment of overt bigotry — especially against other races and/or sub-racial groups (i.e. ethnicities). Not only does it fail to prepare children for the practical reality of an increasingly racially/ethnically diverse and populous society and workplace, it also makes it so much less likely those children will be emotionally content or (preferably) harmonious with their multicultural/-racial surroundings.
Children reared into their adolescence and, eventually, young adulthood this way can often be angry yet not fully realize at precisely what. Then they may feel left with little choice but to move to another part of the land, where their race or ethnicity predominates, preferably overwhelmingly so. If not for themselves, parents then should do their young children a big favor and NOT pass down onto their very impressionable offspring racially/ethnically bigoted feelings and perceptions, nor implicit stereotypes and ‘humor’, for that matter. Ironically, such rearing can make life much harder for one’s own children.
One means of proactively preventing this social/societal problem may be by allowing young children to become accustomed to other races in a harmoniously positive manner. The early years are typically the best time to instill and even solidify positive social-interaction life skills/traits, like interracial harmonization, into a very young brain. Human infancy is the prime (if not the only) time to instill and even solidify positive social-interaction characteristics into a very young mind.
Spot on!! I plan on sharing this valuable post with my AFAM Studies students – thank you again!
Thank you!!!